Week oneIssue 2 of 6

The BZ Chronicle

SquallyIsland weather, Wed

All the news the island lets us print

Vol. 2026-10No. 2Saturday 10 October 2026Vanilla Solo edition

Week oneChapter oneday 6 of this map29 days left in the season

Transit, briefly

A parachute opens 28.5 metres below the island, with kurukuro still attached ¶

A fall from 1,493 metres ends with the canopy deployed at a height the island records as negative.

On Tuesday, kurukuro stepped off from 1,493 metres and, at the appointed moment, opened a parachute. The appointed moment was 28.5 metres below ground level.

The canopy was open for 0.2 seconds. Parachutes are built to slow a resident on the way down to the ground, and this one was asked to start work some time after the ground had already been reached and, going by the figures, gone through.

The island has not commented, though it is understood to have watched the whole descent with great interest. The transit desk notes that the record for the lowest successful parachute opening on this map stands at zero metres, and that nobody has yet beaten it from below.

The Wire

Thu 15:17. A resident put 10 scrap on the big wheel and walked away with 20, which is the wheel working exactly as advertised for once.

Thu 23:45. An elite crate at S1 was opened for the first time this wipe.

Fri 00:23. A resident caught an anchovy a minute after losing one, and kept fishing anyway.

Fri 04:20. Somebody bet 168 scrap on the big wheel and received nothing back.

Sat 10:48. A small shark came out of the water on the end of a resident's line.

Sat 11:31. A resident did 750 scrap of business with a vendor, the largest single deal at the counters this week.

Sun 06:07. Another 144 scrap went onto the big wheel and stayed there.

Tue 12:16. A second resident opened a parachute 16.9 metres below ground the same day, after 1,511 metres and a second and a half in the air.

Wed 05:11. The wheel at Bandit Camp paid out 406 scrap, and 205 of it went straight back on a minute later.

Wed 18:00. Somebody fed 2 scrap into a slot machine and got the usual answer.

Business & the Casino

STAROSTA turns 405 scrap into 8,505 on a single spin ¶

Last season's four thousand scrap trick has been answered, and doubled.

On Thursday, STAROSTA placed 405 scrap on one spin and was paid 8,505. Over the whole session the net gain came to 7,950 scrap, which means the wheel was allowed to take a little back and was not allowed to take much.

The last issue wondered whether the casino floor would find another four thousand scrap moment on the new map, or whether last season's luck had stayed behind with the old one. The answer arrived on the first day, and it was more than twice the size.

The wheel spent the rest of the week recovering its losses from other residents, a few hundred scrap at a time.

Crime & Courts

Twelve to three, and other unfinished conversations ¶

Three feuds and three acts of revenge kept the island's grudges well fed.

The week's most one sided rivalry reached its latest instalment on Saturday afternoon: one resident has now killed the other twelve times, and has been killed back three. Two smaller feuds ran at four to one in each direction, which suggests the island is producing both the persistent and the persecuted in roughly equal numbers.

Revenge was served at three different temperatures. One resident waited 11 minutes at Large Harbor before settling an account with an MP5. Another took 34 minutes in R19 and used a Thompson. The most patient waited 36 minutes and squared things at Small Harbor with an AK47U.

None of the parties involved has signalled that the matter is closed.

The first death of the wipe was by hunting bow, and the tools did not improve much from there ¶

The first resident to be killed by another this wipe fell on Thursday afternoon in R8, to a hunting bow. It set a tone. On Friday another hunting bow did the job in U4 from 14 metres, a crossbow claimed a resident from 20.8 metres in S19 on Thursday night, and on Saturday afternoon somebody in T7 was dispatched at a distance of zero metres with a salvaged icepick, a tool designed for rock.

At the other end of the scale, three single lives did an outsized share of the island's killing. One lasted 2 hours 59 minutes and accounted for 70 residents. Another ran 3 hours 5 minutes and took 69. The longest lasted 23 hours 55 minutes and ended on Monday with 93 residents and 48 scientists to its name, the scientists presumably having been in the way.

New Arrivals

Newcomers waste no time finding the good crates ¶

Of the week's 121 arrivals, several went straight to work.

One newcomer finished a mission on Friday with less than half an hour on the island, before most residents have worked out where the water is. Another managed it after 2.6 hours, and a third on Wednesday after 8.1.

Three more were the first to open elite crates at their monuments. Two of them did it at Small Harbor, one with 3.1 hours on the island and one with 7. The third opened the first elite crate at Military Tunnel after 8 hours, which is not a place anyone wanders into by accident. The island tends to be hardest on its newest residents, and this week a few of them were harder on it.

The Farm Report

Reeseus grows a hemp plant with a near perfect gene line ¶

On Saturday, Reeseus produced a hemp clone carrying the genes GYYGYG: three for growth, three for yield, and nothing wasted on anything else. Residents who have spent a wipe sorting through plants full of unwanted traits will understand how rare a line this clean is. It will be worth more than most of what the island has been fighting over.

Monuments

The Airfield door becomes the most popular locked door on the island ¶

The last issue asked whether the new map's monuments would be shared out evenly or whether the population would settle on favourites. Early evidence points to favourites. A single locked door at the Airfield was swiped 49 times by 19 different residents this week, the busiest of any on the map. Nineteen residents agreeing on anything is notable on this island. It happened on the first afternoon of the wipe.

Obituaries

A resident who harmed nothing for 7 hours 16 minutes ¶

Died early on Monday after a long life in which not a single creature, rabbit included, came to harm by their hand. Of the 7 hours 16 minutes, 5.8 were spent at home, which may explain the record. The island got to them in the end anyway, as it does with everyone, though in this case it had to make the first move.

A resident who wandered peacefully for 6 hours 28 minutes ¶

Died on Wednesday morning, having spent 6 hours 28 minutes on the island without harming anything and without spending a single hour at a base. A life lived entirely outdoors and entirely without violence is an unusual thing on this map. The island appears to have found it unusual too, and closed the matter.

Weather

ThuShowers
FriPassing showers
SatPassing showers
SunClear
MonPassing showers
TueShowers
WedSqually

Showers came and went on most days, Sunday was the only day without any rain seen at all, and Wednesday turned squally, with storm in 5 per cent of readings and the week's thickest fog.

Watch next week

Whether the resident on the losing end of twelve to three finds a way to make it twelve to four, or whether you will be reading the number fifteen next week.
Whether STAROSTA holds on to the 7,950 scrap, or whether the wheel collects it back the way wheels usually do.
Whether anyone on the island opens a parachute above ground level next week, after two residents on the same Tuesday opened theirs below it.