All the news the island lets us print
Vol. 2026-09No. 4PvE Hardcore edition
Week threeEarly edition
Last wipe's kill record finally goes under
Seven days ago X_X T0A5T3D's NPC count for the wipe stood at 3,629, within sight of crass_user's 3,962 from last wipe but not yet past it. It now reads 4,087, with 222 hours and 55 minutes logged on the island and 710 coins looted along the way. All three numbers now sit clear of the marks the old wipe left behind: 125 kills past crass_user's 3,962, 27 coins past his own old total of 683, and a playtime record that was already broken a week ago and now stretches further still past Yadernij_Gus's old 185 hours.
The gap to second place widened again. Sir Sniffalotapus, currently the closest challenger on the NPCs killed board, sits at 2,998 kills and 95 hours, 1,089 kills behind. Tken, who held second place a week ago, is still parked at 2,707 kills and 142 hours and 44 minutes, exactly where the standings found him last time, the chase apparently called off for now.
The week opened squally on Wednesday, and squally is how most of it stayed: passing showers Thursday, showers Friday, another squally patch Saturday, showers Sunday, and a third squally day Monday, the wettest of the run, with storm conditions catching nearly one sample in twelve and the fog banks thickening well past the island's usual haze. Then, on the week's final logged day, Tuesday came back reading clear across every single sample taken, the first such day this ledger has recorded in three weeks of watching.
A busy week of fights, capped by a nightmare-tier helicopter
The island logged 1,595 separate stretches of NPC fighting this week, the usual mix of substations, harbors and gas stations that never quite fall quiet. crass_user put in more of them than anyone, 127 fights across the week, well clear of the field. BzK spent Wednesday morning working through the rarer calls, a standard supply signal at 06:27 followed by a premium one barely twenty minutes later, and on Monday evening X_X T0A5T3D took on the nightmare-tier patrol helicopter, tougher and rarer than the standard patrol most residents settle for.
Large Oil Rig keeps its crowd, and one door falls twice in under a minute
Keycard doors opened 442 times this week and puzzles gave up their loot 1,407 times. AD22, the Large Oil Rig's grid reference, kept doing what it did last week: Yadernij_Gus, TreeManeZane, Sir Sniffalotapus, Lieutenant Worm, brando, Sofa and sitys all started crates there across the seven days, the platform still the island's busiest address. Wednesday afternoon tgm.master went through its level two door and its level three door twenty eight seconds apart, barely pausing between locks. Not every puzzle gave in so easily: one, cracked Sunday afternoon, sat untouched for nearly two hours before its owner spent a further two hours and twenty five minutes actually working it open.
Four hundred and forty seven trips to the planters
Growing sessions were logged 447 times this week, hemp, pumpkin, corn and berries by turns across dozens of plots. Kleister put in more of them than anyone, 38 harvests over the week, the island's busiest farmer by a comfortable margin. Slim Pickens took two rounds of corn within twenty three minutes right after midnight Wednesday, the kind of night that suggests a very specific harvest schedule.
One life ran fifty four hours, another ran forty two minutes
Three hundred and fifty two lives on the island came to their end this week, counted the way the island counts them: exactly. Bagadonuts' current life finally closed out Tuesday evening after fifty four hours and forty minutes alive, 984 players and 739 scientists down by the time it ended, along with 169 animals and nearly nine hours spent camping inside monuments, comfortably the longest life the island logged all week. TheFlyingCow's Saturday night went rather differently: forty two minutes alive, a handful of animals accounted for, and nothing else to show for it before the life closed.
One resident, one wheel, and a run that kept climbing
Suwako was the entire casino desk this week, placing 31 bets at the Large Barn's big wheel with nobody else's name turning up in the ledger at all. The run climbed steadily from a lost 44 scrap stake Thursday evening through a string of escalating wins on Saturday, peaking at a 660 scrap payout on a 165 scrap bet just after noon, before a smaller streak on Monday afternoon closed out the week's action.
Twenty one crates in twelve minutes, and a diver who never quite dries off
Nobody dropped into the water Saturday morning and surfaced twenty one crates in barely twelve minutes, the great majority of everything the deep sea desk recorded this week. ИГРОК spent the rest of the week doing the opposite of a single dramatic haul, diving in and climbing back out again and again between Thursday and Wednesday, rarely staying under for more than a couple of hours at a stretch.
Nine hundred scrap sold, and one visit that paid nothing at all
TreeGoat sold more scrap to vendors than anyone this week, 900 of it across three separate 300 scrap sales. BzK made a similar circuit but with mixed results, an evening stop on Monday that returned nothing at all sandwiched between two that paid out normally. The week's only kit came out of the redemption machine on Saturday afternoon, when Sofa claimed a Bow kit for himself.
The old wipe's numbers, all three cleared at once
Two hundred and twenty three new skills went into residents' heads this week, 249 elite crates were cracked open first, and 26 purge wins were claimed across the island. The Stoic One took three of those purge wins, more than anyone else, and Lil-Poot claimed 24 of the elite first loots, also comfortably clear of the field. Measured against the wipe before this one, the season's numbers have now caught up entirely: X_X T0A5T3D's 4,087 NPC kills clear crass_user's old mark of 3,962, his 710 coins looted pass his own former record of 683, and his 222 hours and 55 minutes stretch the playtime record, already broken last week, further still past Yadernij_Gus's old 185.
The week's names, one column at a time
Bagadonuts' fifty four hour life is the longest anyone held onto the island this week, Lil-Poot's 24 elite first loots lead a crowded field by a wide margin, and TreeGoat's 900 scrap sold is more than twice what anyone else brought to a vendor.
Lil-Poot
Lil-Poot's week ran on repetition. Wednesday night he cleared the watch at Ferry Terminal, then spent the rest of the week returning to the same two doors, D3 at the Large Harbor and W3 at the Small Harbor, swiping into both across three separate days. By Saturday he had a nightly appointment with the Lighthouse too, coming back to fight the same profile there three times across four days, Saturday, Sunday and Tuesday alike. His longest life of the week, logged just before midnight on Wednesday, ran seven hours and twenty eight minutes and closed with forty players and thirty eight scientists against his name.
He claimed more elite first loots than anyone else on the island this week, 24 of them, two of which came at unnamed sites a day apart, Sunday night at grid A3 and Monday night at grid A4. In between he kept a full circuit going: harvesting berries and pumpkin at the planters, a pair of dives into deep water, and two scrap sales to the vendor for good measure. Ten different kinds of activity, 173 events in all, across a week that never really let up.
Whether X_X T0A5T3D keeps padding the NPC record now that crass_user's old 3,962 is behind him, with eight days left to do it in.
Whether Large Oil Rig's crowd at AD22 keeps drawing names, seven of them this week alone, or whether somewhere else finally takes the address away from it.
Whether Tuesday's clear read was the weather easing off for good, or one calm day squeezed between the squalls that dominated the rest of the week.